The Theater BUFF

LYSISTRATA JONES -- first preview thoughts

 

me and mrs. jones

 

 i don't know... i'm a little confused... but, then again, i'm not...

for the most part, i liked it... but, well, i got REALLY bored in the middle of ACT ONE... like head wobbly, 11th grade "when is class going to end?!" bored...

the same things kept happening... a bunch of cheerleaders would come out and do an odd dance... and then a bunch of basketball players would come out and do an odd dance... and then they would ALL dance together... and then a plus-size, african american woman would come out and belt...

repeat... toss basketballs around... repeat.. brighly colored costumes... upbeat mediocre songs... repeat... minimal story... repeat...

lotsa high school girls in the audience...

repeat...

lotsa gay men too...

repeat...

oh ok... we are nearing the end of ACT ONE... oh WOW... the chick that plays LYSISTRATA ( Patti Murin ) is singing a pretty incredible number... wow, it is long... but i am AWAKE now... i might even care about her character... she is REALLY singing the hell out of this song...

ok... i am staying... i was going to leave... but, no... i am staying...

and well...

ACT TWO is kinda great... i like the story... it is meaningful... the songs are better in ACT TWO... i am NOT sleepy...

cute guys... often shirtless... interesting couplings... surprise twists...

repeat...

oh and here it comes... they are FINALLY going to sing the song from the website... " GIVE IT UP! "... i like this song... and the message... and it is ON the website... so i can hear it when i want...

oh wow... and i just figured out what is wrong with the show... it JUST came to me...

it REALLY shouldn't be on BROADWAY... it is a cute, energetic, fun, quirky, meaningful, crowd-pleasing show... but, it should be in a nice off-broadway theater... give it a little CHERRY LANE action... LUCILLE LORTEL it !!!!

that's IT... i DID like it... i REALLY did... i just did not like that they spread it thin in a HUGE BROADWAY house... that's all... fair enough...

LYSISTRATA and THE THEATER BUFF... yep...

we got a THING goin' on...

BONNIE & CLYDE -- first preview thoughts

 

kindlin'

 

i'm tellin' you that stage is gonna BLOW... geez... it's gonna BLOW... 

the set for BONNIE & CLYDE is planks of wood... planks and planks of wood... the floor is wood planks... the walls are wood planks... the set pieces are wood planks... if they can involve a WOOD PLANK... they will... and they do... i promise...

it looks VERY "sauna in somebody's townhouse"-like... and then it starts to feel dry... and, well... WOODEN... because it IS ... and then you imagine that ANY small flicker... any small spark would LITERALLY set the WHOLE damn stage at the (annoyingly named) Gerald Schoenfeld Theatre on FIRE... and, if you are BOTHERING to imagine all this (and there IS time to... because things get BORING!)... you imagine it going up FAST... you can ALMOST hear the resonating " PUFF "...

the fabled PUFF OF SMOKE...

 wow... and yeah, i said it quickly... but, um... god bless the Schoenfeld's... bless 'em... uh, you can pretty much GUARANTEE that NOBODY says... "we are seeing a show at "the Gerald Schoenfeld Theatre"... really... name ONE person that says that... name them !!! where, certainly, there were many people... over MANY years...  that said... we saw it at THE PLYMOUTH... MANY... again, i promise... i do... i really promise you this...

anyway, there is an OFFICIAL broadway TREND happening... and this show confirms it... fully OFFICIAL... 

there is a JACUZZI on stage... YES... like in GODSPELL... at one point, members of the cast lift (some of the) planks of wood to expose a small pool of water... and a cast member is dunked... uh huh, another body of water on a BROADWAY stage...

how they will incorporate a JACUZZI into the upcoming revival of PORGY and BESS?!...  we can ONLY guess... but i have NO DOUBT that PORGY will be dealing with JACUZZI issues... after all, it is a FULL ON fall 2011 BROADWAY trend !!! 

i can see BESS showing PORGY the JACUZZI WARNING... 

Due to the high temperature of the water in the spa/Jacuzzi, generally 104 degrees, as well as the extreme heat in the Sauna, you should check with your doctor to make sure that it is safe for you and your guests to use these facilities.

it's the JACUZZI WARNING that GEORGE GERSHWIN forgot to compose...

ok...

the GOOD...

these are the TWO MALE leads... 

dreamy... talented... keep the audience's interest... on ALL levels... love them !!! hot... great.. truly hot and GREAT !!!

nothing against their female counterparts... but, these guys are SERIOUSLY fun to watch... and i REALLY DO mean that on all levels... great, fun, enjoyable energy...

the BAD...

there is ONE woman i would like to comment on... the woman who plays BONNIE's mom... it is actually a bit odd... she is horribly miscast... when she enters... it REALLY appears that she is in a high school production...

the one where a 15 year old girl has to play an elderly woman... it is STRIKINGLY odd... at first she seems like a minor character... but she does get some MAJOR moments and she DOES... she REALLY DOES... well, she clashes against the rest of the cast... tell me if you agree with me... she just seems off... like a VERY young woman playing an older character... if she WAS a 15 year old girl playing the role... i would be minorly impressed... but, honestly, even then i would think... "couldn't they find a better 15 year old girl"... just sayin'... maybe it is just me... feel free to comment...

overall, the show is just kinda OK... i REALLY wanted to like it... the story is interesting enough... and the VERY first song made me think... "cool, i want the CD"... but, sadly, i do NOT want the CD... and i would not recommend this show.. there is nothing SPECIAL about it... it is like SISTER ACT... which is MIDDLING... only LESS fun... not a GOOD sign... 

not worth the money... just a fact...

if someone won two tickets to this show at a church bazaar and gave them to you... and you went... you wouldn't be MAD at the people who re-gifted a church bazaar prize to you... but, you would be WARY of these people for AT LEAST a year after...

somewhat suspicious...

for, at least...

a year... 

JOE GULLA, THE THEATER BUFF – INTERVIEWED FOR PARAGON MEN

PARAGON MEN chose me as their
NOVEMBER " SPOTLIGHT " ... 

you can find the interview RIGHT HERE...

to " LIKE " the " GARBO " FAN PAGE... go HERE...

" DY " info... well, i'll have that for you in a MINUTE !!!

ok...

 

HUGH JACKMAN, BACK ON BROADWAY -- first preview thoughts

 

papa, can HUGH hear me ?

 

i've failed my readers... i've failed myself...

i was unable to attend HUGH JACKMAN, BACK ON BROADWAY's first preview... this is MY JOB... i KNOW you depend on me...

but, please understand...

many things kept me from HUGH tonight... many... 

i could pour my heart out to you... i could... you'd learn more about me... and, in your listening, i might learn something about you... but, the truth is...

i'm not even sure who you are and that would be strange all around... i mean, how much do you really need to know about me? we shouldn't be rushing into anything... best to take things slow...

but, i DO apologize... and i offer TWO acts of contrition...

1. i will post my ALL-TIME favorite picture of HUGH JACK MAN... i swear, i will... i swear... in fact, i will post it RIGHT now... right here... right under these words... here goes...

ok, that was easy enough...

2. number 2... is a LOT more personal... i will share words, i will share feelings... not quite poetry... more, as the star of SHANGHAI SURPRISE would say... LIKE A PRAYER... 

a prayer... as i face the scrutiny of my fellow theater bloggers... a prayer... as i await the wrath of my disappointed readership...

a simple YENTYL-esquian prayer...

 

Can all the words in all the blogs
Help me to face what lies ahead?

The trees are so much taller
And I feel so much smaller;

The moon is twice as lonely
And the stars are half as bright...

Papa, how I love HUGH...
Papa, how I need HUGH.

Papa, how I missed HUGH's
Goddamn FIRST PREVIEW night...

<flicker... flicker... puff>

again...sorry guys ! we'll always have GODSPELL !

GODSPELL -- first preview thoughts

 

it's ELECTRIC...

 

ok, well, i innocently walked into the CIRCLE IN THE SQUARE theater... innocent, calm... i was going to see GODSPELL... sorta harmless...

yes, i WAS concerned that this was, in some way, STILL related to the PAPERMILL PLAYHOUSE production i had seen a few years ago... i did NOT like that production... many people did... i did NOT...

i remember that one of my friend's ACTUALLY got MAD at me for not liking it... i was, like -- it DID NOT move me... it DID NOT inspire me... and the performances, for the most part, were MASTURBATORY...

this GREATLY annoyed him... anyway...

first...

i thoroughly enjoyed walking into the theater... the simple set and the way the place was lit was SOOO appealing... should you end up seeing this production (i DO NOT recommend that you do!)... but should you END UP there... you will ENJOY the pre-show lighting... EVERYONE looked kinda SEXY... it is just THAT kind of lighting... everyone is sitting, wandering and leaning... and the lighting just does GREAT FAVORS...

also, there is a SIMPLE, SLOW dripping of water that comes from the celing and lands in a mini pool on the stage... drip... drip... drip... you can't keep your eyes off of it... DRIPS are usually causes for concern... or action... this DRIP is FEATURED... LIT WELL... this DRIP is HAVING its MOMENT...

cool DRIP... cool people... COOL lighting...

next thing i know...

MY HEAD EXPLODED !!!

i am serious... my HEAD EXPLODED...

i never undestood what this expression meant... but now, unfortunately, i DO... it would be fruitless for me to explain what it is like to HAVE your explode... if yours HAS exploded, you will understand what i am talking about... if not, i can ONLY explain when and why MINE did...

the show started... an URGENT woman walks on the stage and is holding an open umbrella... she is NO WHERE near the DRIP... so it is a GRATUITOUS umbrella-holding... listen, seriously... that is just plain ol' BAD LUCK... why you would want to needlessly incorporate that into a show is BEYOND me... theater people are superstitious... we can't say "GOOD LUCK"... but we can have open UMBRELLAs in shows ?! i mean, SINGIN IN THE RAIN... ok... but GODSPELL, i don't know...

just sayin...

ok, well things were moving forward... nothing great... just ok... when ALL OF A SUDDEN... a pixie, waify, ballerina girl starts to sing DAY BY DAY... who doesn't enjoy DAY BY DAY... it is a sweet song... and has ALWAYS been a lovely GODSPELL moment... all these years later, i was hoping to have someone sing it... well, just sing it calmly and resonatingly... its already a "WIN" of a song... you can't do MUCH wrong...

well, for NO APPARENT reason... NONE... all of a sudden, the WHOLE CAST is doing... i swear... i am not joking...

THE ELECTRIC SLIDE...

the FULL-BLOWN... ELECTRIC SLIDE...

for a LONG time... no IRONY, no REASON...

i thought... WHY? WHAT IS GOING ON? AM I....

then... MY HEAD EXPLODED!!! it was the ONLY appropriate response...

a little later... i was back... i stayed for the whole show... i endured it... when i think back.. i just see FLASHES... i will share them... they are fragmented... random... but they DID happen... 

ok...

one

just as the show is about to start... the lights dim... and LATE-COMERS begin arriving... they trample over you... and they are carrying something... 

well... these are NOT late-comers... they are the band/orchestra... the band/orchestra sit... scattered... and separate... among the audience... if you are lucky, YOU may sit next to an oboe...

these poor guys can't even hang together... and they are harassed by audience members at intermission... give this a month... this is FORM OVER FUNCTION gone AWRY !!!

two

at one point, they FORCE an audience member to play charades... the girl they FORCED was, clearly, an actress... and she was OVERDOING her CLUE-GIVING... anyway, she was chewing gum in a gross way... and one of the actors IGNORED her clues and kept saying "BUBBLICIOUS"...

ha!!! that was my SECOND FAVORITE PART of the WHOLE show... after the DRIP...

three

during intermission i went to the restroom, no one was talking about the show... suddenly, i heard a guy behind me say "it went REALLY fast"... so i thought... OK... people are LIKING the show...

turns out.... he was talking about the REST ROOM line!!! he was right, by the way!

four

ok, this is ODD... there was one actress that stood out... she was NATURAL, you "felt" her... she sang well... just a STAND OUT... she wore a skirt that was gold... like a gold lame' grass skirt... well, i RAN out of the theater when the cast started taking bows... oddly... iN THE LOBBY... DURING THE CURTAIN CALL... she was sitting on a chair... and WEEPING... there was a lady with a headset near her... she was not doing anything... and there was NO indication of what happened... and NO INDICATION as to why she could NOT be sitting and weeping somewhere else... in private...

again, this was DURING the curtain call... i have NO IDEA what happened to this girl...and the rest if the audience was going to be as SURPRISED as i was about her sitting in the lobby weeping... i hope the HEADSETTED lady eventually helped her... i was confused and concerned... i just wanted an EASY break...

five

there is a CRINGE-Y, CLOYING steve jobs comment in the show... it is just STUCK in there... and it gets corny applause... odd and nauseating.. GRATUITOUS AS CAN BE...

six

is the muscular guy the same guy who played JESUS in the PAPERMILL production... if so... why was he demoted? was it him? the guy who plays JESUS is EXACTLY like the claymation puppet in RUDOLPH THE RED NOSED REINDEER... the one who wants to be a dentist... only the puppet is way more interesting... why was the muscular, talented guy demoted?

seven

oh, finally, the URGENT umbrella-holding girl sings BY MY SIDE... it is hard to explain... BUT... she sings BY MY SIDE in the most THREATENING, FORBODING, SCARY way... she points at JESUS and seems to be ANTAGONIZING him...

gotta be PEBBLE IN HER SHOE rage !!!

eight

oh and, um, the LAST SUPPER is held around a JACUZZI!

yep...

 

 

MAN AND BOY -- second preview thoughts

 

harumph !

 

back...
 

yes... i am...

summer... GARBO... more summer... chicago... about to start work on the return of GARBO... but that did not stop YOUR thetheaterbuff from kicking off the FALL THEATER SEASON... here i am... just for YOU...

yep...

and don't say i don't work hard for you... cause, lord knows, i DO... yes, that was me... running... literally RUNNING... well, ok, a trot-like run... more than a JOG... less than a RUN... but sorta RUNNING down 10th avenue on sunday, september 10th at 1:45-sh...

you see... at 12 pm, i caught Jeton Neziraj's Demolition of the Eiffel Tower at John Jay College... Ariot Myrtaj killin', killin'... CRAZY killin'... a damn STAGED READING... taking the READING... owning it... KILLIN' and SKILLIN' it... ALL OVER THE PLACE... anyway...

after being KNOCKED OUT by myrtaj's performance there... i had to RUN... RUN, i tell ya...

to the AMERICAN AIRLINES THEATER on 42nd... 

sat down... wouldn't say i was sweating... kinda just shiny, but a matte-ish kinda shine... the kind you let stay because the air conditioning blends with it and it cools you in a more efficient manner...

before i knew it, a shirtless man walked out on stage... in a towel... came out and started playing a piano...

what a FANTASTIC omen for thetheaterbuff coverage this season... nice !!!

anyway...

let's get REAL about MAN AND BOY... everyone is basically sitting there... WAITING... for FRANK LANGELLA to come out... seriously, NO ONE would be going to see MAN AND BOY on BROADWAY if FRANK LANGELLA was not going to appear on that stage...

people in MY audience were so CRAZED with anticipation for FRANKIE... that when MICHAEL SIBERRY entered... EVERYONE APPLAUDED WILDLY... they thought is was FRANK !!! it was really, really FUNNY...

MICHAEL SIBERRY's agent, mom and tailor will be SO THRILLED with this set up... this is likely to happen EVERY night...  you feel the audience realize it is NOT LANGELLA... this, of course, is after they ponder... 

"wow, i haven't seen FRANK in a while... has he changed THAT much?" 

"he looks odd! not bad... just NOT like himself!"

MICHAEL SIBERRY will experience a GREAT internal chuckle EVERY night ! god bless, mr. SIBERRY !!!

well, FRANK does eventually enter... the applause was SOOOO tenative... we were AFRAID now... is that him? wait, looks like it... yeah... i guess... i hope...

ok...

well, as for FRANK... there is a LOT of HARUMPH-ING going on... it is a performance made of HARUMPHS and SILENCES...

BUT... WOW...

the NEGATIVE SPACE builds up... it catches up with you... it is STILL catching up with me a few days later... LANGELLA delivers...

no surprise... but the early HARUMPH-ing had me worried...

i REALLY enjoyed the show... great story... lotsa pathos... glamour... drama...

it has stayed with me... and i will probably return !!!

the BUFF is BACK... talk soon !!!

 

 

 

 

 

Garbo – The Play

 

 

GARBO has been invited to participate in the TIMES SQUARE INTERNATIONAL THEATER FESTIVAL...

GARBO  -- THE STAGED READING ! 

tickets are ONLY $10 ...

order here >>> http://tix.smarttix.com/Modules/Sales/SalesMainTabsPage.aspx?ControlState=1&DateSelected=&DiscountCode=&SalesEventId=1387&DC=

 

 

 

BEST FEATURED ACTOR IN A MUSICAL -- tony moods, modes and musings

 

who's on grove?

wow, um... the only show i saw in this group is BOOK OF MORMON... and i had to google rory's picture and i still couldn't figure out who he was... i am guessing he is the FIRST guy who rings the doorbell in the opening "doorbell number"... "guessing" is the operative word....

colman domingo... adam godley... forrest mc clendon... um... ok... congratulations guys !!!! you were nominated for a TONY !!!

john larroquette... you were ADORABLE playing leslie knope's potential stepdad in a GREAT episode of PARKS AND RECREATION... oh... and you were nominated for a TONY too !!!

let's raise a glass... ketel one martini, straight up, olives.... to this year's BEST FEATURED ACTOR IN A MUSICAL nominees !!!

let's drink the martini !

p.s. LIN MANUEL MIRANDA is on MODERN FAMILY tonight !!!

p.p.s. i bumped into (drunkenly approached!) chris jackson at MARIE'S CRISIS somewhat recently... actually it was a week after the IN THE HEIGHTS' final performance... it's a bit of a blur... but, i remember cursing the possibility of NE YO playing his part in the movie... hugging his wife... repeating over and over  -- "YOU DID IT, CHRIS !!! YOU FUCKIN' DID IT !!!".... i do not recall what i was referring to... i complimented some man's very stylish sunglasses... he was in their group... i likened him and lin manuel to classic comedy teams... i think i mentioned ABBOTT and COSTELLO... i hugged him too... twice, maybe three times... it was a moment... it was kinda ugly... kinda shocking...

more shocking is the fact that MARIE'S CRISIS is still there... and OPEN !!!

p.p.s. MARIE'S CRISIS serves some people drinks in plastic... some people are served in glass... i was served IN GLASS... i'm not sure how they make that determination !

BEST FEATURED ACTRESS IN A MUSICAL -- tony moods, modes and musings

 

hearts and lollipops

one of the most horrifying moments of this theater season was the sight of PATTI LUPONE... dangling from a bungee cord... licking a lollipop... hovering over orchestra section, row B...

this happened at the end of WOMEN ON THE VERGE OF NERVOUS BREAKDOWN's first act !!!

my OWN heart ached for her... i still have flashbacks... and i still can't believe she did that for the run of the show... i saw the first preview... so, for all i know, they released her from her lollipop-licking obligations... i pray this was the case...

people raved about her courtroom song... um... i think it was "lesser of the evils" syndrome... it was all so upsetting... i just felt horrible for her... like me, i am sure she thought that pedro almodovar's classic movie COULD be a fun musical...

it was NOT !

it was a ROYAL, CRAZY and MORTIFYING disaster... my lungs are still reacting to the PROPANE they used to set that damn bed on fire... a horrible effect in a horrible show... that and the clanky taxi... it just craaaaaaawled up and down the moving walkway... clank... clank... stutter... clank...

jesus!

granted LAURA BENANTI's song was cute... fun... good... it REALLY captured the spirit of the film and she sang it well... if someone tosses a TONY at her for that song... it would kinda make sense...

sorta like a soldier receiving a PURPLE HEART !!!

to me, VICTORIA CLARK looked bored and "over it" in SISTER ACT... this was during the first preview !!! perhaps things have changed because the show got some REALLY decent reviews... the "excited" audiences may energize her... i wish this for her... because, left on its own, that show can get REALLY dull... here's to hoping...

NIKKI M JAMES is a cutey and is the HEART (yep!) of THE BOOK OF MORMON... she worked earnestly and enthusiastically and sang her, yes, heart out... it makes the most sense that she will win this award... so, i will hope that she does... good luck, NIKKI !!!!

i did not see HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING, so i cannot speak for TAMMY BLANCHARD...

gotta be honest though... there is absolutely NO RING to ...

"and the TONY AWARD goes to TAMMY BLANCHARD!"

(you really HAVE to admit that!)

TONY MOODS, MODES AND MUSINGS -- intro

 

intro

 

i have been traveling... all over the damn continent.... busy man this theaterbuff... thank god there has been  an equinox fitness center in all the cities i hit... well, actually, there was no equinox in vegas, but the aria had a VERY well-equipped gym... great spa too...

as you all know, i was MAJORLY disappointed in this theater season... sad really...

i can't predict.... analyze... or discuss... who will win a TONY and why... the season made NO sense to me...

NONE... ZERO...

ZERO SENSE...

BUT...

since i am THE THEATER BUFF...

for the weeks leading up to the TONY AWARDS... i will take a category each day... well, MOST days... i still have some travel planned... i'll take each category and give my thoughts... comments... and i will include personal anecdotes...

you'll see what i mean when i do it...

i hope it is fun, funny and informative and helps us get our minds off of a lackluster season !!!!!

thrilled to be back... and i am OFF from the gym today !!

REALLY enjoying that  !!!